Like an undecided ghost
I lingered on the threshold of two worlds
Lost in the silence of their million miles
I waddled through thick fog and fiery furnace
They passed through me a zillion times
They left no traces of their passage
Save their tales on my lips
To touch a million and more lives
I drove myself to the get a new Hairdo today.
I know it’s nothing new or noteworthy, but for three years I made my hair at home or by myself.
Last year I started going to the salon once in a while, driven by my Dad or my brother accompanied by one or two of my sisters.
Today, I drove myself without escorts and it was fun.
I have formed the habit of taking notes of how far I’ve come and how far I go each day. It has given me the strength to keep moving and to be thankful for all I had taken for granted before now.
Everyday I learn to do a new thing fills my heart with joy. Either finding an easier way to use the stairs, the bathroom, even to cook in the kitchen, it all makes the journey interesting and smoother.
Whatever difficult situation you find yourself today, remember it gets better, might be hard and uncomfortable at first but you get there eventually.
Keep moving, and never stop believing.
These make my day everyday.
What makes your day…?
I remember her eyes. There was something eerie about them. I can almost see her now like I did four years ago. She was dark and thin, but there was strength in those eyes, in their depth. The way she blinked and widened them….I still get goose bumps whenever I remember them. She was feeble but her upper arms were strong; thin, but steady like her icy eyes.
I was about to jump into the waiting cab when they flung opened and our eyes met. Mine held, even when hers dropped to straighten her floral skirt. I hardly stare or take much notice of strangers but for some reasons I was glued to that spot. I was frozen. Now, when I think of it, I still have no idea why I paused.
When she looked up, I looked away, embarrassed like a child caught peeping through a key hole. Then I saw a young man, maybe her brother judging from the same set of full upper lips and oversized nose. He looked worn out in a dirty jeans and faded t-shirt holding her wheel chair. I stepped back to give him room, just realising then that I was blocking the way. I couldn’t stop myself from watching their well mastered performance of moving her from the car to the chair. How she folded and shrank her body into a ball, her hands hugging her chest to make it easier for him to lift her into the wheelchair. I was enthralled. Then our eyes met again. I turned and hurried on to get another cab even as the driver was calling me to come back. As I was about to to step onto the cab, I glanced back and our eyes met, again. Hers hardened and then widened, with contempt? I have no idea. I wondered why at first, then I realised she must find it irritating. I wished then that I could show her my thoughts. Or maybe she was offended that I didn’t take the cab? I sighed and closed the door.
I tried not to look to my right as I rode to lecture. But I couldn’t stop my mind from wandering to her. I pictured her bathing, dressing, growing from girlhood to womanhood. I wondered if she had a boyfriend. Will she have children, know the joy of motherhood? Then I saw another boy hopping on one leg and a wooden crutch. I wondered what happened to him too, was he born that way, or an accident? How does he survive every day knowing tomorrow would be the same? What does he do when in danger? Who looks out for him? Who takes care of them all? I didn’t have to wait for long to find out. As I didn’t return to my home or bed until four months later. I spent those months in a surgical ward with a front row view watching “Behind the Scene of an Amputee Life”.
Now, I know.