Category Archives: Poems

What If…?

What if I didn’t go out that day?
What if I had missed that day’s lectures?
What if I had ran faster?
What if I didn’t lose my leg?
I have never been able to construct any acceptable scenarios for my what ifs.
Today, I couldn’t stop myself from wandering through their endless maze.
Where would I be if that day never was?
Who would I be?
I can’t say precisely, but one thing is clear; my scars made me who I am today.
If I hadn’t them, I would be ordinary; just plain old me.

The Scream 1 (Excerpt From South West 1)

I am cursed. I am not sure of much for now but of this one fact; I am cursed. And by the time you finished reading my story, you would believe me.

This was my first thought when I came to, I was not sure of that too. All I knew at first was the sun was bright, and fierce, intending to scorch. It was searing, everything was hot my body was ready to combust. However, I was cold too, somewhere within I could feel a weird chill clutching my heart.

The noise was too much, too loud; so many people speaking, screaming in one voice but different tongues. I couldn’t get up, couldn’t move anything, save my right hand. Some parts of me were missing, numb or malfunctioned. The first on my list was my waist downward. I couldn’t feel it.

Later, I was with my sisters; we were sitting outside, chatting and laughing. I do not understand what we were laughing about. Then I was in our backyard arguing with my brother. He became upset walked in and banged the door after him. I hissed and stormed into the kitchen.

The kitchen transported me back to the street, I looked up and saw Taiwo. He was my childhood friend, I hadn’t seen him in six years. The last time I saw him I hadn’t seen him in ten years. The Six years ago was in Ife at Adventist School of Nursing. I was standing at the gate and then I saw him, but I only waved at him because I couldn’t stop to talk to him.

I was heartbroken. I felt dumped all over again by the guy who disappeared with my heart three years before. He called me that day to tell me why he broke up with me. I had spent those years thinking it was all my fault. I should be relieved that it was not my fault after all but I wasn’t. My heart was being smashed all over again.

That was the last time I saw Taiwo until that day on the street where I wanted to buy Daniel Defoe “Robinson Crusoe”. We hugged and exchanged pleasantries. Then I was back home with my younger sister. She wanted to come with me to the campus to print her project work. It would be cheaper there. And then everything was bright again, and hot.

Then I had a bizarre thought; something had sliced me into two. Everything froze at that moment. I felt something warm trickling out of somewhere between my thighs; it was oozing in a strange beat, the same with my heart as if it was being pumped by my heart beat. A nightmare was my next thought, I needed to wake up, but I couldn’t move, every breath was like the last. Something terrible is wrong with me; I had no idea what. I wanted to cry but I had no tears, I was as dry as clay soil in the harmattan.

Maybe I died and landed in hell that would explain the noise and the absence of anybody to help or tell me where I was. Nobody came, there were so many people, voices everywhere but no one to help. I felt so tired, thirsty and feeble.

“I’m going to die or I’m dead already, and in hell. But why is my mouth filled with sand and stones?” I felt like I was hit or pinned by something. A strong cold hand gripped my throat and clutched my heart; it was fear. The night was beckoning fast though the sun was still shining so bright and fiercely hot; I was not ready for its embrace.

 

 

 

 

The Scream is an excerpt from “South West 1 – A True Tale of Loss, Family, Fate, and Faith. “I would appreciate your honest comment. Thank you.

 

When Love Is Not Love

Will love still be love
When all deem it wrong
When the people in love
Are not supposed to be?

Will love still be love
When no one thinks it’s decent
Safe the people in love
And all they have to prove is their love?

Is love still love
When the head says to the heart
“This feeling is so wrong ”
And the heart whispered back,
“But it feels so right”?

Undefined

I should have known
We do not share love
We share something deeper
Deeper than love, passion
Or understanding
We share a bond not of everyday
Or tomorrow
A bond that will outlive us
A bond beyond time and age
It’s always there between us
Drawing us closer
Never together
We share it
We never can have it

Beyond the Blue

As I gaze at the sky
On this bright moon night
I think of a home of bright light
Beyond the starry sky

Where darkness has no place
Where sadness cannot reside
My soul craves its warm embrace
The home of bliss for the blessed

Have You Ever (3)

Have you battled with dream and reality
when both are one and the same?
Have you had to grasp
what you thought was a fragment
of reality
only it was just a dream?

Have you struggled to accept
the savages left
by the storm of life
while drowning in the thoughts
of the used-to-be
the peripheral visions
of what ifs, could-bes and if evers?

If you haven’t,
You are yet to live
If you have,
As long as there is one more sunrise
And one sunset left for you
Nothing is impossible
Hold on